That wee fucker has been eating the fruits in our backyard. We thought it was the squirrels that had methodically plucked and eaten EVERY SINGLE PEAR on the tree. But tonight I was on the back deck in the dark, shucking corn (long story), and I kept hearing the grapevine rustle. I thought I was knocking it somehow with the corn husks, but then I looked up and saw the ratty gray tail on the gray beast standing in the grapevines. At first I thought it was a giant rat, but then I realized rats don’t have that much fur on their tails. This little bastard had no fear at all. Tallasiandude came out and did a goddamn photo shoot, complete with flash, and he just stayed put. Even when tallasiandude got a broom and WHACKED the little fucker, he hung on that vine, chowing down. We had to whack him a bunch of times and then chase him out of the garden.
Wee fruit-stealing sumbitch. Harrumph.
Saw the headline and thought for *sure* I was going to be treated to a description of ‘possum stew or deep fried ‘possum cheeks. Oh well, still a good story.
well, now, there’s a good fucking idea! we can SHOOT the little bastard and cook him. that would be poetic. i like it.